How do you know if you have the Sheep flu? Your symptom are: (1) a fear of wolves (2) a woolly feeling in your throat (3) a cough that sounds more like a baaaa baaaa (4) a fixation with Serta mattress commercials and (5) always looking over your shoulder, for fear someone wants to be Little Blow Peep the porn version a.k.a Sheep Gone Wild.How do you know if you have the Goat Flu? Your symptoms are: (1) a fear of rubber-bands (re how to fix a goat cheap) (2) the table magazines are looking very delicious (3) everything is looking edible (4) a cough that sounds like naaaaa naaaaa and (5) the over-whelming feeling of wanting head-butt people in the backside.
How do you know if you have the Cow Flu? Your symptoms are: (1) large splotchy areas starting to form all over your body that resemble the Rorschach inkblot test (2) large leaky utters forming above your belly (2) a cough that sounds like mooo mooo (4) the need to be called Bessy and (5) the urge to constantly chew on something called feed. Yum
How do you know if you have the Horse Flu? Your symptoms are: (1) a large amount of hair starts growing out of your backside (2) you are constantly prancing and galloping (3) your cough sounds like a whinny, neigh, snort (4) you starting counting by stomping your fo-hoof and (5) You can swat flies with you tail.
How do you know if you have the Pig Flu? Your symptoms are: (1) you just got back from a Mexico vacation (2) you find yourself face first, and ass up in the garbage can (3) your cough sounds more like a grunt (4) your house resembles a sty and (5) you watch Charlotte's Web and Babe for the 100th time.
Happy Tuesday
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